A Year Of Sobreity

Today is Thursday January Twenty First Two Thousand Ten. Big day for me today and I began it by waking up at five am to go to the gym. I did this because I wanted to meet my sponsor Ed at the Hair Of The Dog meeting that begins at seven thirty. Its a men's meeting and one of my favorites but I don't get to attend it very often because I like to be at work by eight thirty or so. There is the one dude there who is homeless and you wouldn't know it by looking at him that he was. He seems to have the wherewithal to find a place to live he just chooses not to. I totally don't get that, even if I have a small bedroom in a crappy apartment like I did in Somerville it was still my own and a place to rest my head. I realize that everyone is entitled to do their own thing but thats something I just don't get.

Its weird to be walking around today after not having a cocktail for a year, I am no different than I was yesterday but am certainly different that I was last year. I realize there is a possibility of a letdown after today but I am going to try my best not to experience that. Its going to be cool not to be counting the months anymore and I am just someone who doesn't drink. No big deal, its a part of a healthy lifestyle that I am dedicated to. When I first got sober it was a big deal and it helped to be reminded of where I was when I was active. Now I feel that it is a part of who I am, a building block to a better life for myself and those who I interact with often.

I am really looking forward to next year. The first thing I want to get squared away is my drivers license. My previous license was revoked due to a DWI I got on Christmas and I decided not to get my license back because I was still drinking every day and I would be royally fucked if I was caught again. I made a promise that I would only get my license back after I had been sober for one year. The time has come and I dread making the phone call to the registry to find out how much they are going to jack me to get it back. Following being able to legally drive in MA I guess my next step would be finding a car to drive. I mentioned this to my folks and my dad offered to help me out but I am not sure at this point how much cash I want to spend on a car. My first thought was to spend eight or nine k on a mini because they are cool. That would be great but spending fifteen hundred on a beater has its merits as well. An AA friend offered to sell me his sedan for that price and while its pretty fugly it only has something like fifty thousand miles on it. Don't think I can go to wrong with something like that.

Another thing I am looking forward to doing this year is finding someone to date. Its been a really long time and while I am not all that lonely, I miss that physical intimacy that goes along with a relationship. Women always took a back seat to feeding my head and if one came along for the ride then great. If not, no big deal I'd rather just drink anyway. I realize that as an alcoholic I present some challenges for a woman but I also think that I offer a variety of positive things as well. You want honesty ? Got that covered. One of the many things I have learned over this past year is to be patient and let some things come to you and thats what I have planned for this area of my life.

Well, thats it for now. I need to get cracking on some things here at work. Quite possibly the biggest asshole on the planet works in the network design group here at CHB and I owe him some data. He will try and belittle me as much as possible till I get it done and I just don't need that today. I owe it to my boss as well so I ought to get on it.

ONE YEAR MOTHERFUCKERS !