My Doctor, Patience, & Friendships

Today is Thursday February Twenty Fifth Two Thousand Ten. Went to the doc today since the last time I saw him I had about a month of sobriety. He is from China and answers his own phone, calls you back quickly, and will make time if you need to see him asap. He is very old skool but I really like how he runs his practice and I wouldn't have it any other way. I won't tell others who he is because I don't want to ruin a good thing. Ok, maybe I will tell one person if they are worthy but thats about it. He was pleased with my progress and I have officially lost twenty five pounds as of today. Its a bunch of weight for the time but I have been super aggressive in my diet as well as the exercise. He said that for my height and age that one eighty is the recommended weight but thats just crazy talk. He sucked some blood out of me and hopefully nothing will lead him to want more tests or anything like that. I am very worried about all the damage I may have done to my liver and other internal organs but I just have to keep living the way I have been and hope for the best. The only thing I can do is to be healthy and do what they tell me. Sounds similar to another program but I just can't put my finger on it.

Last nite was a exercise in patience for me because due to the tardiness of some friends I didn't get to see the opener and that was the only reason I was going to the show in the first place. I know I am super anal about being early but being ninety minutes late to something just isn't right in my mind. I wonder when you stop being polite and start saying what the fuck ? If I ever meet these people again I am going to insert a forty five minute lag time whenever I need to meet them for something. If they don't like it, I will just point out that they have been late for every event they have met me at and I am getting a little fucking tired of it. Anyway, the crowd was filled up mostly high school girls but Mayer did have some pretty good guitar parts I will give him that. All in all, I think I would have been better off not going but what is done is done.

One major personal problem about last nite was these god damn nicotine mints gave me a major case of gas. Here I am hanging out with four lovely ladies and all I can do is concentrate on not farting. As I have reported previously its not like these farts dissipate quickly and without any scent like they usually do for me. Oh no, these are loud vibrating lingering horrific smelling farts and they would def know where they came from. One benefit I guess in going to a show filled with women is that there weren't any lines for the mens room. I had to go to a couple of fart missions so I would be ok later. It was funny however, to hear the yelps of horror when the next guy came into the bathroom. I realize this is super nasty but I just want to warn anyone that if you eat these lozenges and have any type of fiber in your diet look the fuck out ! Thankfully I was able to contain myself and dance with the chiquitas for most of the nite and now that I admit about it had a good time.

So I am over my crushes for the time being and I know I was being silly but if you can't be silly once in a while why live at all ? I have made peace with it and I have to realize a couple of things. First is to be patient and keep doing what I am doing. I am a good guy and people seem to enjoy my company most of the time and eventually I will find someone. The second is that most of the women I seem to find myself interested in are in the twenty nine to thirty four age group and if they have not been married or had children yet that may be on their mind. Due to that they are going to check you out and make sure that you are worth their time. I don't blame them and nor do I want to date someone who is willing to sleep with me after only knowing me a sort while. I just can't separate sex from love in my mind and in order to be intimate with a woman I have to have some sort of bond with her. My guy friends would say thats a total woman thing to say but its the truth. Even when I could I never slept with someone just to do it because thats not how I am constructed. I just find woman very interesting and fun and appreciate their outlook on things. Ya, they can be crazy but we all can every now and then.

It was good to talk with Courtney last nite and we purposely didn't talk about Randy when we were together. Her friend Carolyn is a hoot and its a pity she isn't a few years older or I would probably be in love with her. I am going to try and see if Courtney is available to hang out when I am in Topsfield the weekend after next and maybe spend some qt with her and the girls. If not maybe she can escape for a few hours and we can really talk about whats going on and what I can do to help out. If all she wants is an ear to listen then thats fine with me. She is probably my oldest and best female friend and I would do anything for her. Well anything except for dating because that would be like sleeping with my sister. She is attractive and I'm sure she is creative in certain areas but thats totally not on my radar. I have proven that I can have deep and meaningful friendships with xx chromos without thinking about how they would look nekkid. Sometimes that can be difficult but I believe its important to have female friends in your life.

My replacement travel mug came yesterday and I am going to plug the product. If you need a leak proof travel mug that will keep your beverage of choice hot for hours then the "Contigo" is for you. The design and color are swell but the thing just works and keeps my coffee not just warm but hot enough to burn the christ out of my mouth. I need to remember that when I am making my starfucks instant in the morning so I can actually drink it at some point. I also got my travel french press and with some measurement alterations of my usual routine it should work quite well. The final package that was waiting for me when I arrived home was my two additional pairs of sneakers and of course I am pleased. I picked up a new style of sneakers beyond the stan smiths, superstar 2's, and campus and they are awesome. They damn well should be considering the cost but I am not going to think about that right now.